


close ain't close enough

by sysupportgroup



Series: pea's bleak boyband bingo 2020 [2]
Category: SEVENTEEN (Band)
Genre: Canon Compliant, M/M, Overstimulation, Plot What Plot/Porn Without Plot, Porn with Feelings, Power Bottom, Switching, they're in LOVE your honour
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-22
Updated: 2020-04-22
Packaged: 2021-03-01 21:55:10
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,249
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23784268
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sysupportgroup/pseuds/sysupportgroup
Summary: “Have I ever told you,” Jeonghan says and maybe it’s up there with one of the most sincere things he’s said all day, “that you’re very hot when you’re in America.”Joshua blinks at him. Twice. And then once more for good measure like he’s having problems processing the segue.“No,” he says finally, red tinting his ears, “no you haven’t.”“Well you are,” Jeonghan says, snaking a hand up into Joshua’s pyjama shirt to touch the warm curve of his waist, “being here changes you.”“I’m the same as I always - ““No,” Jeonghan cuts him off, biting his lower lip, “you’re different here. When you speak English, your attitude changes.” He fits his palm to the small of Joshua’s back and feels light-headed at how perfectly his hand fits there in the divot. It sends him giddy, how well they slot together.“You’re a brat here,” he says absently but with perfect enunciation, “I kind of like it.”
Relationships: Hong Jisoo | Joshua/Yoon Jeonghan
Series: pea's bleak boyband bingo 2020 [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1595206
Comments: 34
Kudos: 336





	close ain't close enough

**Author's Note:**

> title taken from nick jonas ft tove lo's close
> 
> this was originally started for the 'different language = different persona" square of bbb but i never finished it before the deadline oop :") as you may also tell, it was based off svt's i dare you with teen vogue whilst they were in america and jeonghan's awful _awful_ eyefucking at timestamp 7:43
> 
> enjoy !!

“...has so many great qualities and it can easily be paired with other foods.”

Jeonghan doesn’t mean to. He really doesn’t. 

(It’s a lie. He does.)

The dip of his eyes to Joshua’s lips as he says the last sentence isn’t lost to Joshua. Unknown to the cameras, he sees Joshua’s lips tensing into a tight curve, his expression betraying nothing else but polite listening as he stares blankly into Camera 1. He doesn’t look at him once, no, but it barely surprises Jeonghan. Would frankly be disappointed if Joshua had. They’re far too trained to slip up like that.

The thought has Jeonghan wondering whether he can push it further. Extend a hand to pinch at the swell of Joshua’s ass, pass it off as one of his usual tricks. Maybe even a hand on his thigh, thumb barely nudging at the inseam of Joshua’s slacks. He could make a game of seeing how far Joshua would let him stray...

Joshua’s entirely too wide smile cuts off that thought before it can fully form, clapping his hands and saying something in English that Jeonghan’s brain is too jetlagged to try and interpret. The production crew laugh and Jeonghan figures there must have been something funny there, something witty, and for a second he feels a brief spark of… envy? Envious that there are parts of Joshua that he can never fully have, not even if he learned English to full fluency. It irks him, bothers him like the scratchy tag on a new shirt. 

He’d never really grown out of his possessive streak.

//

In the van, Jeonghan puts his hand on Joshua’s thigh like he’s wanted to for the rest of that interview and squeezes.

Joshua turns to look at him. Mouths _knock it off_. Jeonghan refuses to. Squeezes him again, a little higher up, curves his hand into the territory of inner thigh. 

Joshua’s eyes get a little sharper and it’s something new, something fresh. He blatantly turns up the volume on his phone and twists away from Jeonghan to stare out the window, leaving Jeonghan to his own devices. 

Seokmin - precious pure Seokmin - taps Jeonghan on the shoulder worriedly and whispers, perhaps a tad too loud, “Is Shua hyung okay?”

“He’s fine,” Jeonghan says curtly, digging his nails in slightly to feel the flesh give way to the imprints of his fingernails. It’s strangely satisfying. But Joshua still doesn’t turn back and Jeonghan’s smugness fades quick, “we’ll work it out, don’t worry about us Seokmin-ah.”

“If you say so,” Seokmin says, meek. He turns away but seems to remember something and comes back, head cocked to the side, “by the way, did you still want me to room with Chan tonight?”

//

The concert goes as well as it could, more than one member down and the rest of them trying to fill in the gaps as best they can. Jeonghan isn’t an exception, he gave his selfishness towards the group up years ago, had it trained out of him again and again. It’s the reason that he pushes on when his tank is veering towards empty after the monster that is _Getting Closer-Rock-Clap_ , dragging himself through the opening ment with two bottles of water and burning muscles. Gives _Just Do It_ every ounce of energy he has, all with a fat exhausted smile fixed onto his face. Pain is temporary, he reminds himself, but then again success is too. Suffer the first for your chance at the second.

Sometimes he wishes he could be just as selfless when it comes to Joshua. And then he doesn’t because without his selfishness, Joshua wouldn’t be underneath him on this hotel bed, fresh and warm from the shower, glaring up at him with those new eyes. 

“Joshuji,” he says, for lack of any other words, tone lilting up at the end.

“Jeonghan,” Joshua says, still glaring but making no move to get up, “you said you weren’t going to pull anything.”

“I’m not,” Jeonghan says, fake-hurt, “why would you accuse me of such a thing?”

“Because you ambushed me as soon as I got out of the shower?” Joshua says bitingly, an eyebrow raised like he’s daring Jeonghan to come at him. 

“‘Ambushed’ is barely the - “

Joshua scoffs and twists his legs up around Jeonghan’s hips. In one deft motion, they’re flipped and their positions reversed. Jeonghan finds his head wedged partially in the crack where he’d pushed Joshua’s and Chan’s beds together.

“Yes?” Joshua prompts, looking particularly pleased with himself like the cliche cat that got the cream. Jeonghan feels his stomach stir at the sight, a warm heat gathering in the pits of his stomach. 

America brings out the cockiness in him, Jeonghan realises faintly, so _that’s_ the new thing. 

“Because I don’t know what else you jumping on me right out of the shower and dragging me to the bed is, other than an ambush.” Joshua hums, checking his nails in a show of disinterest.

“Have I ever told you,” Jeonghan says and maybe it’s up there with one of the most sincere things he’s said all day, “that you’re very hot when you’re in America.”

Joshua blinks at him. Twice. And then once more for good measure like he’s having problems processing the segue. 

“No,” he says finally, red tinting his ears, “no you haven’t.”

“Well you are,” Jeonghan says, snaking a hand up into Joshua’s pyjama shirt to touch the warm curve of his waist, “being here changes you.”

“I’m the same as I always - “

“No,” Jeonghan cuts him off, biting his lower lip, “you’re different here. When you speak English, your attitude changes.” He fits his palm to the small of Joshua’s back and feels light-headed at how perfectly his hand fits there in the divot. It sends him giddy, how well they slot together.

“You’re a brat here,” he says absently but with perfect enunciation, “I kind of like it.”

“Is that why you tried to give me sex eyes when you were talking about tteokbokki?” Joshua’s jaw drops and he smacks Jeonghan on the shoulder. Hard, “Seriously? The entire room noticed!”

“Only a little bit,” Jeonghan admits, “I didn’t really know what I was saying for the most part, I was pretty tired.”

“Tired enough to try and seduce me in front of three cameras and half our members?” Joshua mocks.

“I’d say I’m succeeding rather than trying, really.”

“ _Are you serious,_ ” Joshua bursts out in English, the irritation in his eyes making perverse affection bloom in Jeonghan’s chest, compelling him to drag Joshua down into a long kiss. 

Joshua tries to push him away, token resistance more than anything else, but he always comes back to Jeonghan in the end. Call it Stockholm Syndrome, friendship forged through flames, sunken cost syndrome times infinity: they’re too entangled for Jeonghan to ever imagine them apart. 

(His nineteen year old self would have never believed it - this naive American trainee, all limbs and insecurity, he’ll take care of you. He’s annoying, knocking down all the walls you painstakingly built up the first time you met. One small smile and you were gone. He makes you more determined for everytime you want to give up, lets you steal his Coke from his minifridge and never replace it, holds you as you cry in his arms whilst the sky ripens into a bruise. He’ll be your first kiss - no, not Hayoon from Class 3, she has a boyfriend, just give up - but you won’t know what you’re doing the first time, delirious and adrenaline-filled at the end of one of your concerts. You’ll kiss him, he’ll kiss you back and you’ll never want to let him go.)

Jeonghan lifts a hand to cup Joshua’s face, sighing languid. The moment is slow and sticky like honey, his other hand roaming further up Joshua’s back, glacial like they have all the time in the world. He traces his spine with his knuckles, counts the knobs there by touch all the way up to Joshua’s shoulder blades where he splays his hand out finally, greedily enjoying the new broadness. 

“Joshuji,” he teases with half-lidded eyes, angling his head just so, exposing the long line of his neck.

“Stop calling me that,” Joshua narrows his eyes like he’s displeased but his actions tell a different story, practically egging Jeonghan on. He brackets Jeonghan’s head between his forearms and it brings the glide of his pink tongue across his lips further into Jeonghan’s line of vision. A challenge.

“Make me,” Jeonghan knows that fans like to characterise him and Joshua as rabbits but he’s never quite identified with it (definitely not the way Soonyoung’s resonated with his animal persona). But when Joshua has dangled a carrot like that in front of him, what choice does he have but to willingly enter the trap.

Joshua lets out a low laugh, delighted. There’s an unfamiliar twinkle in his eyes when he surges down to kiss Jeonghan again, long line of his body pressed achingly up against Jeonghan’s and a leg slotted in between his. His mouth is warm and wet, more nipping involved than usual and when Jeonghan pulls away breathlessly to make a comment about it, Joshua just smirks and grinds his thigh into Jeonghan’s crotch.

“Brat,” Jeonghan sputters out, impossibly turned on.

Joshua says something back in English, tone biting and snarky and everything Jeonghan loves to pull out of him in their private moments. He looks way too pleased with himself though and Jeonghan feels the itchy urge to fuck the smugness out of him, break him down with his fingers, his mouth, his cock. Until he can say that he has seen and conquered every part of Joshua for himself.

“Off,” Jeonghan demands, tugging at Joshua’s loose sleep shirt. His mouth is dry, aching for something to sate the itch of want, “I want to see you.”

“Oh do you now,” Joshua laughs like he’s twirling right out of Jeonghan’s reach, hands grasping around empty air. He grinds down purposefully and grins at the way Jeonghan’s mouth falls open, leaning in real close to mouth at his jaw, “get it off me then.”

“Are you testing me,” Jeonghan snickers in return, heady with the excitement of the new game. He bunches up the loose material from Joshua’s shirt at the small of his back, makes the material cling tight to the curve of Joshua’s biceps and pecs, “be like that then, I don’t mind.”

He props an arm up underneath himself, startling Joshua back a few centimetres, and dips his head to lave at Joshua’s chest, worrying at a nipple through the fabric. It tastes like fuzzy cotton in his mouth, drying it out, but it’s entirely worth it for the aroused groan he gets in return, Joshua’s hand snaking around to the back of Jeonghan’s neck as if to keep his head there.

“You couldn’t have just taken my shirt off?” Joshua strangles out, winding his fingers further into the longer hairs at the back of Jeonghan’s head.

“Where would be the fun in that?” Jeonghan muses, pulling away in satisfaction. There’s a large wet spot where his mouth was, Joshua’s nipple clearly hard and visible now. 

Joshua rolls his eyes, about to say something back, but Jeonghan just gives him a cheeky smile and lifts the hem of Joshua’s shirt up and over his head, flinging it to the end of the mattress once it’s off. 

“Better?” He laughs, pressing kisses to Joshua’s other nipple and then up his sternum, trailing butterfly pecks all the way down his jaw until just beside his lips. He lets a hand drop down from Joshua’s hip to his butt, squeezing it lasvaciously, “What about now?”

“You’re fucking impossible,” Joshua mutters, shaking his head and stripping Jeonghan’s shirt off too, dropping that by the side of the bed. His hands are warm and ever-impossibly-large when he touches Jeonghan, feels like they could wrap around his torso twice and still have handspan to spare, “what am I going to do with you?”

“Fuck me, hopefully,” Jeonghan chirps, squeezing Joshua’s ass with both of his hands now, “I’ve got lube and condoms in my pocket.”

“Pervert,” Joshua groans but it’s humoured, fond.

“You love it,” Jeonghan says back and he means it. 

Joshua huffs but it’s the way he does it when he’s trying to be cute. Jeonghan’s seen his actually-pissed huffs to know. Those are still pretty cute though.

“Pants off then,” Joshua says like it’s such a chore to fuck his boyfriend when he’s been blue-balled for two weeks, “I guess I can do that.”

//

“Seriously?” Joshua groans, digging the heel of his foot into Jeonghan’s back, “why am I on the bottom again?”

“You agreed to the game,” Jeonghan reminds him pleasantly, tracing one of his fingers around Joshua’s slicked-up entrance, “plus you like it more anyways.”

“You know I fucking suck at rock-paper-scissors,” Joshua sulks, impatiently bucking his hips towards Jeonghan, “I had to clean the practice room f-four - ah, shit - times in a row before we left.”

“I stayed behind with you all four times!” Jeonghan protests, scissoring the two fingers he’d slipped in whilst Joshua was occupied. Joshua bites his lip and clamps down tighter around his fingers and fuck, Jeonghan just hopes he can hold on once he’s inside. 

“All you did was lie on the mats in the corner and take videos of me bending over!”

Jeonghan shrugs and crooks his fingers upwards, kissing Joshua’s cheek when Joshua moans at the feeling, “Is that a crime? Appreciating your ass?”

“ _You’re_ an ass,” Joshua snipes back, reaching down to take himself in hand as Jeonghan adds another finger. His breath is coming in shakier bursts though, small grunts punctuating the obscene sounds of him getting finger-fucked. Before long, he’s starting to fuck himself back on Jeonghan’s hand, the (utterly inappropriate) minor ego boost that he thinks about smugly when other members are monopolising Joshua’s attention. None of the other members will ever know how pretty he is when he’s desperate and wanting for it. They may have heard him once or twice (oops) but only Jeonghan will ever see him raw like this, chest flushed, dick leaking, drool on his cheek. 

Something dark unsheaths its claws in Jeonghan’s chest. Tears would make him prettier - what are the chances he could get Joshua to cry for him tonight?

Jeonghan twists his fingers all upwards in a confident practiced motion, fucks them up against his prostate relentlessly. Joshua’s mouth opens for a silent scream but Jeonghan wants to make him _sing_. He bats Joshua’s hand away from his cock to start pumping it himself and Joshua’s voice spills out like a dam flowing over, pitching higher with every little _uh-uh-uh_ noise punched out of him.

“Gonna come for me?” Jeonghan asks, demanding, “Come in my hand, sweetheart.”

“Not your sweetheart,” Joshua chokes out, eyes squeezed shut, muscles fluttering around Jeonghan’s fingers like a vice. He’s so defiant today - Jeonghan adds it to the long list of things to blame America for. 

“No?” Jeonghan hums, nipping at the curve of Joshua’s ear, tonguing the silver loop of his helix, “Do you have other people messing you up like this?”

Joshua glares at him wetly, digs his heels in harder and says, “I could if I wanted.”

Jeonghan clicks his tongue, perverse glee overtaking him as he lines himself up and pushes in with one swift stroke, “Wrong answer.”

“Fuck!” Joshua loops his arms around Jeonghan’s neck, arching up prettily. His body shakes as he spills all over Jeonghan’s hand, sobbing Jeonghan’s name with equal amounts of love and pure exasperation.

“Yes sweetheart?” Jeonghan grunts, working him through the aftermath with lazy passes of his hand. It’s less teasing and more shaky now that he’s embedded so deeply into Joshua’s body, the flutter of Joshua’s hole around him as he shudders through his orgasm making Jeonghan will away his own orgasm that’s building in his stomach.

“Not - “ Joshua gasps, slapping away Jeonghan’s hand tiredly when he starts twitching from sensitivity, “Not your sweetheart.”

“I suppose that’s true,” Jeonghan laughs breathlessly, swiping two fingers through the gloss of white on Joshua’s stomach and sucking them off with a lewd pop, “you’re not being very sweet, are you?”

“Fuck you, I can be as sweet as I want,” Joshua snorts before quickly biting back a whimper at the way Jeonghan’s cock drags against his walls, lighting his nerves up all over again.

“What do I have to do to get you to consider me, Joshuji,” Jeonghan sighs dramatically, his lamenting expression completely at odds with the way he increases his pace, dirty and rough, “all I want is your love.”

“You’re an idiot,” Joshua rolls his eyes and yanks Jeonghan down for a kiss, mouthing shakily against his jaw when he breaks away, “you know you have it.”

“Yeah,” Jeonghan hums, delighted and appeased, “I know. I like hearing it though.”

“You’re a dick.”

“But you _love_ it.” Jeonghan grins, all white teeth and wolf eyes, fucking himself in deeper to make Joshua shudder underneath his hands, “Won’t you say that you love me, Joshuji.”

Joshua sighs and with one swift movement, digs the heel of his right foot into Jeonghan’s back and flips them around until he’s the one perched prettily on top of Jeonghan’s cock, clenching down so hard Jeonghan thinks he’s on the verge of passing out.

“You’re not playing fair,” Jeonghan croaks out, momentarily stunned.

“Aren’t I?” Joshua croons next to his ear, pretty but dangerous and that’s when Jeonghan starts bracing himself for a long night ahead, “But I _love_ you Jeonghan-ssi.”

//

Jeonghan comes a total of three times that night - the first time within a minute of Joshua riding him into the bed, the second when Joshua slides him out and starts jerking him off moments after whilst Jeonghan swears to the ceiling, the third when he lets Joshua fuck him instead just so his dick can have a break. He passes out at the end of it all, stamina depleted, only to wake up clean and Joshua snuggled into his side, lips perpetually turned up at the corners like a smug cat.

The sky is still dark, just the slightest sliver of orange and pink cutting across the dark canvas outside the window. Joshua makes a snorting noise in his sleep when Jeonghan shifts to get a better look at the clock set on the sterile bedside table. Jeonghan bites down on his lip, and wraps his arm a little tighter around his slack body, bringing Joshua closer to him until they’re pressed together in one long line. 

Affection blooms, uncontrolled, when he looks down at Joshua’s stupid sleeping face, mouth agape and a brand new pimple breaking out on his chin. All at once, he’s old and young, nineteen year old Joshua superimposed over the twenty four year old in his arms. He wonders if Joshua ever feels the same way when he looks at Jeonghan. 

“I love you,” Jeonghan says quietly, as sincere as he can get at 5am, talking to an empty room and a sleeping lover. He hesitates, looks down at the crown of Joshua’s head and presses a kiss there before snuggling back in, probably to be woken up in two hours time.

He knows he’ll never be able to have all of Joshua - how could one person possess another in their totality - but maybe this will be enough.

**Author's Note:**

> if you liked this fic, pls leave a comment or some kudos !! find me @sysupportgroup on twt, let's talk about jihan :")))

**Works inspired by this one:**

  * [All the Things I'm Thinking](https://archiveofourown.org/works/26256118) by [Auber_Gine_Dreams](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Auber_Gine_Dreams/pseuds/Auber_Gine_Dreams)




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